


Know When To Give Up

by alexdamien



Category: Dissidia Duodecim: Final Fantasy, Dissidia: Final Fantasy
Genre: Crack, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-18
Updated: 2017-10-18
Packaged: 2019-01-19 03:55:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 534
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12402453
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alexdamien/pseuds/alexdamien
Summary: Cecil and Sephirot have a conversation. It does not go well. Crack. Just...full crack.





	Know When To Give Up

"Your planet is an illusion."

"Really? It seemed very real to me."

There was an awkward moment, and Sephiroth narrowed his eyes. He wasn't used to having 'awkward moments', and was already starting to hate them. His enemy just looked at him with a brightness in his purple eyes so shining, he almost lifted a hand to shield his own eyes.

"I mean, I even saw it from the moon realm, and it still seemed very real to me."

"I think you are taking me too literally."

The young man blinked, and Sephiroth could almost see the gears turning in his head. His level of disconfort kept rising, especially because he was used to start stabbing things after a certain amount of time in a battle, and that time had already passed.

"Of course, we must just be confused. It was hard to understand Cloud a little sometimes too, and I think you two come from the same world, right?"

Sephirot took a deep breath as he felt the control of the situation escaping his grasp more and more.

"We do indeed come from the same world."

His oponent smiled in a way that made Sephiroth think of a lightbulb.

"Oh, so I was right! I knew it because both your clothes are so weird."

"Weird...?" Sephirot looked over the man's white and purple armor, his weird blade, and the purple beads cascading over his white hair. How he wished he would just stab people before talking to them.

"Yes, so dull and gray. But you wear jewellry! Your bracelet's so pretty."

Sephiroth narrowed his eyes. He hadn't been comfortable at all with Mateus' idea to 'update his wardrobe', and now was seriously regretting to have gone along with the whole 'beaded jewellry' look.

"And your hair is so nice. What do you use to get it so shiny?"

"If I tell you can we get on with the fighting?"

"Oh, of course, of course. I just thought the beads in your armor and belt are so cute, and I really can't believe how soft your hair is!"

Sephiroth gritted his teeth. The very idea of his name being in the same sentence as the word 'cute' caused him pain.

"You know what?" he took off his overcoat and dropped it on the floor "Let's get this going on. I don't even know the name of Mateus' shampoo, I just steal it from him."

"M-mateus? Emperor Palamecia?"

Sephiroth pointed his sword at him.

"You are only a puppet."

And yet, despite his best effort to sound impressive, his opponent didn't even take out his blade, but just looked at him with a very uncomfortable look.

"...I...Do I have to take off my clothes too?"

The masamune made a metallic sound as it's tip fell against the stone floor.

A silent, heavy awkward moment fell on them. Sephiroth breathed deeply and picked his over coat from the floor.

"MoonShine Shampoo is the name, I believe" he said, turning his back on the white haired man.

"Really? Me and the Warrior of Light use the same one!"

"I'll be sure to tell Mateus."

And he left without another glance. Some battles just weren't worth it.


End file.
